Im Just Saying

By LINDA BRILL / KING 5 News
KING5
updated 10:48 p.m. PT, Mon., March. 22, 2010
SEATTLE – The Seattle School District is now charging a fee on money raised by parents for schools. The new policy is making some generous parents very angry.

The district is now charging parent groups a 3.3 percent fee for their grants to public schools. Money raised from bake sales, auctions and other fundraisers will be charged the fee if the money goes to the school in the form of a grant.

“That adds insult to injury,” says parent Jane Davies, whose parent group raised nearly $90,000 dollars for Salmon Bay School. “We are already having to raise money for what should be covered as basic education and that’s frustrating.”

Davies’ parent group grant is helping to pay for a part time librarian, music teacher and gym teacher.

The Seattle School District says the fee is needed to pay for administrative costs of the grant. They already charge a fee when they receive a federal grant. The district recently announced layoffs of 900 central staff workers in an effort to cut their budget by $25 million next year.

“Parents are the heart and soul and spirit and passion of the Seattle Public Schools. We’ve got 45,000 students and their parents are working every day to support schools by volunteering hundreds of hours and to tax them with a parent tax is just beyond silly,” said State Representative Reuven Carlyle, D-Seattle.

Are you kidding me? So that I understand correctly, Seattle schools can’t afford to spend free money? They have to charge a fee for donating? In what backwards universe does that make sense? Do you know how much time it takes to spend free money? About negative seconds. What, free money? Thank you and it’s gone. That simple. I can’t believe that there’s so much grant money flowing in to a district that is constantly opening, closing, reopening schools and trying to stay solvent, that they need a team of people to manage the fund. It should be pretty damn easy: What ever the money was raised for, that’s how it’s spent. It takes people to figure that out? Sounds to me they just want to keep people on the payroll, are a little butt hurt that parents are doing the job the administration should be doing, and they want to get a piece of the pie. This isn’t rocket science, folks. If the Seattle school district needs to take a cut of free money so they can pay people to dispense the free money, I’d say there are much bigger problems in the district than just a funding shortage.

Too bad our representatives will never put politics aside and fix anything.

So I had intended on doing an entire show on the need for health care reform, as was requested of me weeks ago. But unfortunately the argument I was going to make was a personal one, and due to potentially pending legal action, I’ve decided it’s best left for another day. Instead I defer to that Leftist Nazi, Jon Stewart. That’s right, a Jewish Nazi.

Ok, so I started watching this video thinking I’d get fired up because it was obviously going to put men down and say we’re all dogs and need to control ourselves and blah blah blah. But instead it was actually very humorous and rather than keep my mistake quiet, I felt compelled to share it.

On this past Sunday, the girlfriend and I were downtown for Day Two of the Emerald City Comic Con. Finding myself cashless after Day One, we had to walk a few blocks to the credit union so we could restock our funds. On the way back, a woman in a wheelchair, who I know to be a beggar, approached us from behind:

“Excuse me,” she said. I immediately retorted:
“I don’t have anything, unfortunately.”
“Oh, no, I was just trying to get around you there,” and she gestured to the sidewalk ramp.
“Oh, I’m sorry. No problem.”
“It’s Ok, I understand.”

Then she engaged us in conversation for the next two blocks. My girlfriend called me a punk for assuming she was going to ask for money. When I told her that I had seen the woman before, she said there’s no way I could have remembered her and that I was just covering for looking like an idiot.

Seriously? At what point have I ever passed a bullshit lie off to cover for my honesty? And why would I even need to in this situation. Firstly, I made a reasonable assumption based on the information I had at the moment while passing through an area (Westlake, Pike Place, etc) fraught with beggars, homeless, and street hustlers. Secondly, I didn’t feel the least bit bad about being wrong. What was there to feel bad about? Thirdly, I contend that had I not jumped the gun, she would have in fact hit us up, and her ongoing line of questioning was in attempt to find an opening to try again. And finally, am I a punk for the situation? Is it any one part or the totality of the events? Is assuming she wanted money the crime or not feeling guilty later on? Let me know in the comments….

This presents a larger issue; profiling. Apologist Seattle gets its panties in a twist when it comes up. They say you can’t just look at someone and know what you’re dealing with, the whole ‘don’t judge a book by its cover’ bit. But isn’t our outward appearance a reflection of who we are? If you look homeless, indigent, or otherwise a mess, shouldn’t you expect to be treated as such? And if you aren’t actually homeless. why present yourself that way? It may not be fair, but if you’re a young black man wearing 3XL shirts and huge jeans that sit at your knees, a NY Yankees hat (black, with all the tags still on) turned to the side, a Northface ski jacket in the middle of summer, I’m going to assume you’re a punk wannabe gangbanger up to no good. Don’t like it? Don’t dress like punk wannabe gangbangers. Don’t want to be mistaken for a terrorist? Don’t start praying to Allah at thirty-thousand feet. And if you look homeless, in an area full of homeless people, what do you think people are going to take you for? Most people don’t overtly profile by race, but they do profile by the totality of your presentation. Humanity communicated visually for thousands of years, body language is more expressive than any language on Earth; to cry foul over what is our predominate means of communication is laughable.

Be honest here, folks; those dressing like punk wannabe gangbangers do so because they want you to fear them, to think they’re tough and not to be messed with. It makes them feel stronger and more in control than they actually are. Someone wondering aimlessly around downtown, dressed like a homeless person, is a homeless person. No one presents that image by choice. Everyone with reasonable means dresses to the image and personality they want to convey, and to not judge them accordingly would be antithetical to their very reason for dressing as they do.

Bringing this full circle, I’ll take my lumps when expressing my point of view conflicts with societal norms, but I won’t be thrown under the bus when reality conflicts with the same norms.

I devote a lot of bandwidth policing the inconsistencies of other groups. I rant and rave about religious groups, political groups, and labor groups working against their greater self interest for the greater good in favor of short term but meaningless wins over their enemy of the week. But the time has come for me to police a group I generally claim membership to, though their antics of late have earned as much scorn from me as I give their polar opposites.

From KENS 5 of San Antonio
Emotions ran high last week when an atheist group asked UTSA students to trade in their Bibles for pornographic magazines.

On Monday afternoon, the group set up a table on campus for their “Smut for Smut” trade offer. The group featured a sign at their table that read, “Trade in Holy Text 4 Porn.”

Nearby, some students gathered in protest by reading their Bibles and praying.

After the event, the atheist group posted on their Twitter page, “Too often are we ignored this seems to get people to actually talk to us instead of ignore us.”

The atheist group tells KENS 5 that it will donate all of its Bibles to local libraries.

This comes after bus ads ran last year in Seattle with such tag lines as “Yes Virginia, there is no god.” Atheism is the absence of faith, but this growing movement of (capital A) Atheism is a faith in absence; the absence of God. These ridiculous antics draw negative attention to a people who are supposed to want no attention whatsoever. It also mobilizes the faithful to demonize the faithless and push policies through sympathetic legislatures that damage our society. Atheists shouldn’t taking potshots at Christians (etc etc). Atheists shouldn’t give two shits except in situations where religious belief is being indoctrinated in to our laws. My atheism is not a desire to destroy theology, but a desire to live under my own code based on the reality of our society. I don’t need an explanation for everything that happens. I accept that there some things in this world that I do not understand and probably never will, that sometimes things happen seemingly without explanation.

So I’m calling a Shut it down, Americaon these fascist Atheist groups that expend there energy trying to destroy a group that, by definition, cannot be destroyed by propaganda. Drop your sanctimonious attitude; the faithful are not your enemy, you shouldn’t have the time or desire to fight them. Atheism (little a) is not a movement or a practice or a belief; go about living your life and accept that some people (in fact most people) disagree with you.

LOS ANGELES (Hollywood Reporter) – Speedy Gonzales is taking his folk-hero status, incredible speed and signature red kerchief to the big screen, with help from George Lopez.

The comedian is attached to provide the voice of the fastest mouse in all Mexico for a politically correct live-action/CG hybrid feature set up at New Line Cinema.

The Looney Tunes character debuted in the 1950s as a regular nemesis of Sylvester the Cat. A 1955 short about the tiny hero, “Speedy Gonzales,” won the Academy Award for best short subject, (cartoon). Pat Boone even released a hit song about the famous mouse in 1962.

Over the years, Speedy appeared in the live-action/animation features “Who Framed Roger Rabbit,” “Space Jam” and “Looney Tunes: Back in Action.” But the character has often courted criticism that the ethnic characterizations of him and his compatriots (especially lazy cousin Slowpoke Rodriguez) are stereotypically racist and severely outdated.

Aware of this, New Line and the producers plan to update the brand with a modernized sensibility.

“We wanted to make sure that it was not the Speedy of the 1950s — the racist Speedy,” said the comedian’s wife Ann Lopez, who will serve alongside him as a producer. “Speedy’s going to be a misunderstood boy who comes from a family that works in a very meticulous setting, and he’s a little too fast for what they do. He makes a mess of that. So he has to go out in the world to find what he’s good at.”

That path becomes clearer once Speedy befriends a gun-shy race-car driver.

“Garfield” scribes Alec Sokolow and Joel Cohen will write the script.

Lopez hosts “Lopez Tonight” on TBS and appears in New Line’s ensemble hit “Valentine’s Day,” which has grossed $158 million worldwide after two weekends. He also recently starred in “The Spy Next Door” and provided a voice for “Beverly Hills Chihuahua.

I’m going to ignore that the people associated with the project have shown themselves to be talentless hacks.  The real issue here is that I can’t watch god-damned Speedy Gonzales cartoons because those fucks standing in front of Home Depot might get offended.  That’s not even fair to say, Juan and Pablo don’t give two shits about it, they just want to landscape my yard for a few bucks.  It’s the damn meddlesome lefty apologists that ruined this for us.  Cartoon stereotypes are funny, why can’t we just leave it at that?  Why do we have to pretend that there’s a deeper social commentary to them and that they are some relic from our racist past?  Do you honestly believe Mel Blank hated the Mexicans?  Or people with speech impediments?  I doubt he gave it much thought.  I’ll stake everything on the likelihood that he was just trying to make people laugh.  But the PC Police have taken it away from me.  Well I say no more!  I say no further!  The line must be drawn here!!!  I’m taking my childhood (and my parents childhood) back!  I’m taking it back and taking the power from it and saying it’s just supposed to be funny!  People are generally cool, they can take a joke.  I’ve never heard a Mexican get pissed over Speedy Gonzalez.  I’ve never heard black people get pissed over Daffy Duck.  I’m blind as hell but I don’t protest Mr. Magoo!  It’s just a fucking joke, and you uppity white-folk with too much time on your hands?  I’m cutting you off, you’re ruining life for all of us and sapping the fun out of everything.  Shut it down, America.

I’m taking my shit back….

Im Just Saying: The Podcast
Episode 20

Download the show here.
This week we brag about all the awesome stuff we’re going to do in Vegas, including the Bar and Nightclub convention!!

We’ll be back in two weeks with a recap of the convention, all the cool new booze coming to the market, the cool ass shit in Vegas, whether or not we win big or lose our ass, and a report on Comic-con.

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COLORADO SPRINGS, Colo. (AP) – Puppet cleavage has been ruled out for advertising posters in Colorado Springs bus shelters. Lamar Advertising rejected posters for a touring production of the Broadway show “Avenue Q” because they show the cleavage of a fuzzy pink puppet.

Lamar account executive Jeff Moore says the company takes a conservative approach in Colorado Springs. The city is known for its political conservatism, and some conservative Christian groups have headquarters in the city.

The poster has been replaced by one showing the face of another puppet.

“Avenue Q” is a Tony-winning musical about twentysomething New Yorkers, both human and puppets, searching for life and love.

I don’t have a strong point to make about this, it’s just too silly and ridiculous to be taken seriously. If the people of Colorado Springs are offended by Miss Piggy in a halter top, they are beyond my help. But on the heals of Tuesday’s story, I had to share it.

[UPDATE] Thanks to Consumerist, we have a picture of the whore in question.

CLIFF, N.M. (AP) — Cliff High School students studying World War I history saw a few seconds of pornography during viewing of a video about the 1919 Treaty of Versailles. A History Channel program apparently had been recorded over a porn tape.

A substitute teacher who was overseeing the class told school officials he was shocked by the porn and that he had received the tape from a friend. The videotape apparently was shown at least twice in the classroom without incident.

Superintendent Dick Pool won’t disclose if any action was taken against the teacher.

Several parents spoke at a school board meeting Thursday. Parent Francesca Estevez said Cliff, located in rural southwestern New Mexico, is “very cohesive” and the videotape “was not acceptable by community standards.”

Pool apologized to parents.

The saddest part of this story is that the Cliff NM school is still using VHS.

Ok, I understand that parents have a right to say they don’t want their kids to see material they feel is inappropriate and no amount of me railing against our fear of nipples is going to change that. And I get that it’s not my place to tell them they are wrong (beyond my freedom to express any opinion I desire), and I even get that no reasonable thinking individual would see this accident as something that should be anticipated (a porn tape used to record a history program to show in schools), but I’m not really moved by this incident as much as the overall track record.

We are way too easily offended as a people. If we hear or see something that doesn’t appeal to us, it’s not enough to just not like it; we have to personally affected by it, personally affronted by it. It has to negatively and significantly diminish the quality of our life and we respond with an outrage that previously was reserved the truly heinous. It’s gotten to the point now that people that are the target of said outrage manage it the way you would a petulent toddler. Because we get so worked up over the smallest things, when we’re worked up over big things, it doesn’t have the impact it should. If we react to genocide the same way we react to McDonald’s forgetting to hold the pickles, who’s going to take us seriously. And frankly we get more upset over the pickles than we do over whatever podunk African dictator is killing his constituents. It’s gotten so bad that a certain former governor cum Vice Presidential candidate turned Faux News contributor has made an entire career over being offended.

Being truly offended should spur you to take action to change the actions of those who have offended you. It should be positive change that benefits the greater good. You should be offended by racism, homophobia, dog fighting, and yes even pornography. But you shouldn’t be offended over an accident. Was the teacher dumb? Yes. Why would anyone use a used VHS when this type of thing has happened over and over again? But was his act malicious? No, I don’t suspect it was. And since it wasn’t, what’s to be offended over? You can take offense to the existence of porn in general, but in that case your offense shouldn’t be directed at the teacher, but at San Fernando.

Im Just Saying: The Podcast
Episode 19

Download the show here.
This week we flash back the awesomeness that was Nickelodeon circa 1992.
Also we go out with a little Garfunkel and Oates.

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Questions? Comments? Complaints? Be a part of The Truth: Email me at Michael@imjustsayingpodcast.com